Five Insane Things You Can Do in SR:TT
GamesCom in Germany starts later this week, with Saints Row: The Third on the show floor, but IGN was able to get a small taste of what's to come in November, when we stopped by their offices last week. We gave their editors an hour to mess around in the streets of Steelport and try to see what crazy stuff they would come up with. From that period of sixty minutes comes their new editorial entitled "Five Insane Things You Can Do in Saints Row: The Third".
After playing an hour of Saints Row: The Third, we're about ready to call it the most insane game of the year. And we haven't even played any story missions, yet. We just spent 60 minutes tearing around the fictional city of Steelport, causing as much mayhem and mischief as we could. And we had a blast.
Saints Row: The Third has incentivized f^@$ing around. Everyone loves messing with NPCs, causing destruction, and seeing how high they can get their wanted levels in sandbox games. But here, not only is that stuff good fun, but pretty much everything you do earns you respect points that can be used to upgrade your character.
Here are five of the craziest things we've done so far:
1. Saints Row: The Third lets you customize your character to your own specifically perverted liking. We started out playing as a white dude. Boring, right? So we stopped by the plastic surgeon and before we knew it we were a hot Asian girl. Next, we cranked up our sex appeal until our boobs would give us serious back problems. In order to get the full benefit of our assets, we made our character topless (although the boobs will appear highly pixilated while running around the game). We added a cheerleader miniskirt and, the piece de resistance, a giant wolf head mask.
So our character was a hot Asian girl with huge boobs running around in just a short miniskirt and a wolf mask. Many boyhood fantasies were fulfilled.
The character customization goes much deeper than this example. You can set an age, give yourself blemishes and scars, and even select a voice. Want to be a she-hulk or a 90-year old crack whore zombie? The only limit is your effed up imagination.
2. Like most open-world games, cause too much trouble and the police will be on your back. A group of squad cars will likely create a road block and the officers will be firing at you from behind their vehicles. But not to worry if you have the airstrike in your arsenal. Simply aim, select your target, and wait a moment while hellfire is rained down upon your enemies. Then you're free to make a clean getaway.
The airstrike is also effective against gang members, old people getting in your way, hippies...pretty much anyone.
Another delightful tool in your inventory is the Reaper Drone, which lets you pilot missiles while you hide from a safe distance.
3. Saints Row: The Third has Insurance Fraud missions, which give you a limited amount of time to cause a certain amount of damage to your own body. We would find a busy intersection and just lay down in the middle, letting tons and tons of metal do their worst to our fleshy frame. Not only is it quite enjoyable to watch yourself be ground into the cement by a semi truck, but you also earn valuable respect points. Because you're obviously a psychopath, and no one wants to f^@$ with you.
4. The Manapult is a fantastic invention. Part vehicle, part man cannon, anyone you drive over will be sucked into its chamber. They can then be shot out at your leisure and sent splattering all over the walls of Steelport.
5. The Genki Cannon fires an octopus that will attach to its victim and turn them into mindless, wandering drones. When you feel like it, you can detonate the octopus and take out anything within a small radius.
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